Stepping into the Messy and Embracing who you are meant to be.Mar 28, 2022
I loved our conversation with Ryann - it was so refreshing and authentic. She said this quote above in the middle of our conversation and it just stuck with me. Mostly because I have been there!
When we were building the Bradford - I was on kid duty, they were hungry, and I had to go to Lowes to figure out why our doors were so delayed. So I got them Wendy’s, stuck them on a flat bed cart, and we went in to Lowes. We called it a moving picnic.
I posted it to Instagram and I got dozens of comments about “great idea” and “you are so inspirational.” The truth is that was probably one of the lowest times of my life. I was not trying to be inspirational or get a pat on the back - I was trying to convince myself that I was going to survive. Behind that picture was a mom who couldn’t remember lunches, or even their child’s first year of life. There was a business owner who was out of money and not sure how to finish the project. There was a sister that wasn’t sure if her relationship would make it through. There was a wife who felt an immense amount of guilt for dragging her family into this mess she created. And there was me - who really wanted this, who constantly pushed through all the uncertainty, lack of sleep, fear, and anxiety because it was what she felt passionate about. I was barely surviving.
It was such a dark time and those times STILL pop up. This year we have so many irons in the fire and at one point I looked at Courtney and said- I can’t do this. That darkness was closing in and the feeling of failing at every corner was seeping into my daily thoughts. All around me people are saying “how do you do it?” “Is there anything you can’t do?” “You are so inspiring!” And I really just want to scream that I am failing at everything, I don’t have it figured out, and I am not an inspiration.
But I hear Ryann’s story and I had the same thought that everyone else had- what an inspirational woman. And it made me think, why can I accept someone else’s messy story and not my own? Ryann is an inspiration. You are an inspiration. I am an inspiration. Anyone who takes the rocky path, or even the easy path, is an inspiration. Because it isn’t about how hard your path was, or even how you did all the steps perfectly. It is about stepping into who you are meant to be, and what you are meant to do.
I was meant to walk this path. Ryann was meant to walk her path. The nagging question we all ask when we see someone breaking barriers and owning the life she wants is “Am I where I am meant to be? Am I walking the path I am meant to walk on?” And that my friends, is inspiration. It isn’t about the pretty, the easy, and the polished - it is about taking those really scary steps and starting to walk into the life you are meant to be in.
I hope you find your inspiration this week and I hope you get the chance to be inspiring for someone else by sharing your messy story because you are inspirational.
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