F** The Naysayers

I grew up being told I could do and be whatever I wanted to be. I told them I wanted to be President one day - my parents were all for it. I told them I wanted to be the best softball player - my dad coached my team. My dreams were never shot down and I was never told - “Maybe your dreams are too big and you should do something else.” 

But something happens when you become an adult. We lose that wonder and belief that we can be and do anything. In fact, we stop listening to ourselves and we start listening to those around us and we internalize it. 

When I had my first child - I was blissfully unaware of how to be a parent. All I knew is that when they put that screaming baby on me, I was her mother and by God, I was going to protect her with every inch of my being. I KNEW that I was the best thing for her. Sure, I doubted how much to feed her, or when to call the doctor, but I had not one single doubt in my mind that I was the best mother for Ada. Enter my MIL. She started questioning what I was doing, the schedule I wanted to protect, and how me and my husband wanted to raise her. With my second - it was questioning my health during my pregnancy and how work was getting in the way of parenting. It was always under the surface, passive aggressive comments that just seeped into me. I know what you are thinking - tell her to just go F*%$ off. Well - it isn’t that simple. I really respected her and I really did value her opinion prior to this point in my life. So I listened and I internalized.

I slowly saw my confidence wane. I started questioning myself, who I was as a mother and if I was actually fit to raise these kids. I saw myself disappear and forget who that confident first time mother was. 

Following your dreams is a lot like this. You may not know how to do some things, but you know with a shadow of a doubt that you are on the right path. You KNOW that you weren’t meant for the dream you are chasing. But then someone enters into your bubble and starts questioning everything - they become your naysayer. And because you respect this person, or value this person’s opinion - you listen and you start to question it all. 

I am here to tell you that not one single naysayer deserves to take up any space in your dreams. Shut them out, TRUST yourself. KNOW that you are doing what you are meant to do. And most importantly go kick ass in spite of them. 

XOXO,

Dana